Alan, Ken, Carole and me
Wednesday, March 18, 2009 
You'll have to forgive me, but I'm still on a bit of a high. I've been on chat shows before - including The Late Edition on BBC4 when fellow guests included Tony Blackburn and Shami Chakrabarti - but yesterday was rather different (a bigger dressing room, for a start).
The first thing to say about The Alan Titchmarsh Show (ITV, weekdays, 3.00pm), is that it's broadcast from BBC Television Centre. The same studio, in fact, that they use for Friday Night With Jonathan Ross. That means a decent-sized set and an audience of perhaps 300 people on two levels, giving it the feel of a small theatre.
A car collected me from my office in Soho and 30 minutes later I was in make-up having every imperfection touched up or covered up. (HDTV is going to be hell for people like me!) I could hear one of the other guests - Strictly Come Dancing's Anton du Beke - holding court in an adjoining room. His dancing partner, Erin Boag, was in make up alongside me and actress Nanette Newman.
In addition to yesterday's live show, they were recording items for Thursday and Friday when the broadcast shows are pre-recorded. So while I was in make-up, Jodie Prenger - who plays Nancy in Oliver! - was on stage doing her bit, and other guests who weren't in yesterday's programme were likewise coming and going.
From make-up I was taken to my dressing room. And it's not often I get to say that. In fact, before yesterday, I have only once been given a dressing room - and there was barely room to swing a cat (without hitting the Teasmaid).
This time, as you can see from the pictures above and below, it was positively palatial. What you can't see are the sofas and the wall-mounted flatscreen TV. So I settled down to watch the start of the show (which featured Tony "Amarillo" Christie).
After 15 minutes a runner came to get me and I was taken backstage to meet former London mayor Ken Livingstone and News of the World columnist Carole Malone. Together, we were going to discuss the Chief Medical Officer's proposal to raise the minimum price of alcohol.
And then we were on. Does Britain have a drinking problem, asked Alan Titchmarsh. No, I replied firmly. There are problem areas but the issue of binge-drinking has been exaggerated. Yes, said Ken and Carole, Britain does have a problem, but while Livingstone supported the CMO's idea, Carole didn't. Nor did I.
It was a short, sharp debate, lively but never heated. And it was clear whose side the audience was on. Ours. At different moments Carole and I even got a round of applause. (Warm, spontaneous applause from a live studio audience! You have no idea how good that feels.)
Afterwards we retired to the green room for a glass of champagne and a quick chat with other guests including Kelvin Mackenzie, former editor of the Sun, Nanette Newman and her daughter, TV presenter Emma Forbes.
We were joined, briefly, by Alan himself who was as friendly off stage as he was on it.
Light entertainment? It's addictive.
Reader Comments (7)
My comments have pre-empted you, Simon, on the thread below.
Congratulations! We can imagine the high.
I unfortunately didn't see the show, but l do hope, at some point, you will get another chance to explain, in no uncertain terms, the truth about the ETS fraud, the mother of this wave of nonsense we are being subjected to.
Ken Livingstone! Nanette Newman! There you go again, partying with with the glitterati, the political movers and shakers, the People Who Really Matter.
But did it change anything?
Media tart!
Well done, actually. ;-)
"I'm surprised no-one else has commented on Simon's breakthrough on the Alan Titchmarsh show yesterday. What a coup - on so many levels - and right there on one of ITV's most popular programmes. Did you hear the thunderous applause from the audience?
He looked impressive and authoritative. Goodness knows how he engineered it. Well worth all that dining out."
This was my comment from the thread below. For those who missed it, there are ways of catching up, e.g. www.itv.com. Doesn't anyone realise how difficult it is to get into in a prime-time show like Alan Titchmarsh's? Not to mention the anxt of actually preparing for it. The pressure of a time limited opportunity to air anti-government subjects such as pro-smoking, drinking, social engineering, etc., AND get it right, must have been enormous.
Give credit where it is due. This was a First, a real breakthrough.
There are many good things that came out of this. People are fed up of nanny and anyone from the political parties would be left in no doubt where the sensible majority stand.
That's all hugely dull. Thought Forest was meant to be doing something. I don't even see any record of you having a fag.